As we go through the motions, time keeps slipping away. Remember what it was like when your only obligation was to exist in space? Yah, me neither.
It’s hard enough to get everything done as a (mostly) fully grown adult; adding kids to the equation—something’s got to give. We prioritize, we skip steps, we do our best to get through the ‘must dos’ leaving little time for the ‘wish I could dos’. Life is basically a balancing act with a lot of negotiation in my internal dialogue...
All that said, how do we make sure we’re upholding those core values that carry us through the usually busy, frequently hectic and often stressful daily grind? How do we make sure we’re not skipping the things that keep us grounded?
When I think about what I want my daughter to remember from her childhood, it’s not how much kale she ate (which is a surprising amount for an 18 month old), it’s not how clean our house was (which is NEVER clean enough for a surprise visitor without a frantic 60-second-tidy), or how fashionably she was always dressed (give or take the days she is dressed by her well-intention-ed dad, or the days we didn’t get to the laundry). What I want my daughter, and her eventual siblings (yes mom, we know you want MORE grandkids), to remember is the feeling of being part of a family that is authentically connected.
When there is literally a never-ending list of things I should do, carving out time to focus on family can make me feel like Sisyphus pushing a boulder up the hill.
In my work helping families find calm, in pursuit of mindfulness and attempting to build the life I want, I have rounded up a few things that can help turn the boulder into a small but more manageable stone.
Rituals are habits that begin to feel routine, but whose impact are often profound. In the moment, rituals can feel normal and expected, but in hindsight rituals form the foundation of the memories that stick with you. Here are some rituals I have seen work for creating calm in the storm of a busy life (even though full disclosure—in the moment, they can seem like just another item on the must do list!)